Santa's Lap.. Fraud Exposed

Hi Kids, how long has it been since you sat on Santa's Lap? If it was last Christmas Season (Oct 15 - January 15), you shouldn't read this. As if Santa's missing sleigh and the scandalous rumors about Rudolph's nose weren't enuf, now we have some serious charges about what Santa's Helpers have been doing in the off-season. It isn't pretty. Oh, well, the friendly fellow in the fake beard and red suit outside the Supermarket, he's fine. He looks MUCH better in his Salvation Army uniform, and he goes all over doing good.

It's the other Santas, you know, in the classier stores, they're the ones to look out for. Don't you remember the one creepy guy who smelled like alcohol and stale smoke? Well, he's gone, happily. But there are 100000000000000 Santas-- where do they all go, and what do they do?

No, kids, I can't go any further with this story without parental permission.

Go to sleep now, and think about this question: How much information can you fit on the head of a pin?

love, Gramps